Acorn Collector

“You’re supposed to collect those,” were the first words Cassiopeia said when she entered Veyron’s apartment. Selena didn’t immediately realize what she was talking about, but the amount of vitriol dripping off her words concerning his crime was heavily disproportionate. “Harvest them somewhere, do some actual work. You’re not supposed to buy them.”

“What are you even talking about?” Veyron, to his credit, didn’t sound off-put by Cassiopeia at all. Selena wasn’t sure if it was months of friendship with Cassio, or just his innate ability to stand condescending people without batting an eye. The latter seemed unlikely but — Veyron was also housing an alien. So there was that. That was how they met months ago, after all. Veyron had found himself hosting the said alien, and it took him nearly two weeks to realize what he was doing and to start panicking. Selena was of the thought that it was too late by then — if the alien wanted to harm him, he would’ve — but she’d been friendly enough nonetheless. And so they became friends.

Cassiopeia was part of the package. That, at least, Selena made sure to make clear. She’d reiterated it times and times again because she knew how Cassio could come across. Still, months in, and neither Veyron nor his offworlder roommate seemed to mind.

But, well — at Cassio’s words, their offworlder friend perked up from the corner of the kitchen he’d been huddled in. He had two blankets over him and, beneath them, a robe haphazardly thrown over himself. Beneath all of that, he wore silk pyjama pants — peach-coloured — that definitely didn’t belong to him. Selena knew that he understood the term personal belongings, but she also knew that he was deliberately playing dumb about that.

“These grow somewhere?” Saim’el, all dark grey skin and wild hair — he’d obviously just gotten up — said, raising his freshly declawed hand and showing off an acorn he was holding.

So that was what Cassiopeia had been talking about. Acorns, then?

“Never thought you would be so particular about this,” Selena admitted, then reached for Cassio’s backpack. The other hadn’t even taken it off her shoulders yet, but it didn’t matter. Selena reached inside just to pull the snacks out. Cassiopeia remained unmoving, but Selena could practically see the torrent of energy swirling within her. Cassiopeia could act tough all she wanted, but Selena knew that both of them looked forward to these meetings. Staying cooped it wasn’t so bad — but this was better.

“No, backtrack,” Saim’el said. “We’re not here to discuss whether little Cass is being a hardass about something—”

“Don’t call me—”

“—because she always is. I want to know more about collecting these.”

“—Cass.”

“Your name is too complicated for my alien tongue. Cass it is,” Saim’el finished with an easy lie. Like a liar. Selena just raised her eyebrow, caught the backpack Cassiopeia inelegantly threw at her and placed it on the floor by the couch, and then she down and made herself comfortable in Veyron’s home. “Tell me about acorns.”

“There’s nothing fun to tell about acorns, honest,” Selena said before anyone else could interject and before the whole situation could turn into a pointless debate. “They grow on trees. You collect them when they’re not green, then you remove the cap and eat them. It’s fine if they’re store-bought.”

“It’s not fine if they’re store-bought!” Cassio said. At the same time, Saim’el stopped chewing, and then his eyes grew large. By then, Selena had gotten used to his darkly coloured sclera.

“You remove the cap?” He let out in a whisper, as though saying it louder would make it more real.

“You’ve been eating them with the cap?!” Selena shouted instead, and then she realized how loud she had been. “Sorry! Sorry. That was uncalled for.” Then, she turned towards Veyron, who was flipping through a magazine she didn’t recognize. “You’ve been letting him eat acorns with the cap?”

Veyron raised his head. His tail swished left and right as he considered his answer.

“I’m not his boss. He does whatever the hell he wants,” Veyron said in the end like all of that was something normal and not something to unpack. “But they’re right, El, you probably shouldn’t eat them with the cap on.”

Saim’el shrugged.

“I didn’t die from it,” he said simply. “Alright, what do I have to do to get some actual acorn-picking experience?”

Veyron was the one who sighed the loudest. Selena would’ve bet all her money on Cassio on that one.

“Alright,” Veyron said as he tossed the magazine aside, then sprung up with more energy than Selena and Cassiopeia had seen him exude ever since they arrived. “Get dressed. I’ll see what I can do.”

It didn’t matter. In the end, they couldn’t find a tree Saim’el deemed appropriate — or really any tree they could harvest from at all — but the store near Veyron’s house had the biggest acorns Selena had ever seen, caps and all.